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it's a different kind of desperate

Because I'm not desperate for a job in the way that if I don't get one, I can't pay the bills or something.

I'm not desperate. I could, technically, maintain the status quo and live a nice life. But it's like, I'm 30 now. Aren't I supposed to know what I want to do with the rest of my life? Shouldn't I know what my career is supposed to be?

I've always just sort of stumbled from job to job and while I've liked all of the jobs I've had -- yes, even when I worked at the restaurant because I liked restaurant work, it was just the crazy asshole boss I did not like -- I still haven't found anything that I can definitely say I'd be totally happy doing long term.

I guess I'm just waiting for that moment to strike like my life is gonna unfold and I'll finally know what I'm meant to do. Except it...hasn't. And I remain slightly above average at a lot of things, but not an expert in anything, and it makes me feel pretty unaccomplished.


( 2 beating to the rhythm — get up, get up )
Dec. 2nd, 2015 03:40 am (UTC)
Dude go where someone will appreciate you, or follow the money but eff that place. They don't deserve you.
Dec. 2nd, 2015 06:28 pm (UTC)
I have sent out sooooo many applications I hope someone will call me ~
( 2 beating to the rhythm — get up, get up )